All shook up as airport makes singing an offence

PUBLISHED: 16:39 25 November 2009 | UPDATED: 10:19 12 August 2010

BANNED?: Elvis impersonator Dave Quinn.

BANNED?: Elvis impersonator Dave Quinn.

NEW byelaws introduced at an airport include a restriction on singing and the grazing of animals. Biggin Hill Airport Byelaws of 1997

NEW byelaws introduced at an airport include a restriction on singing and the grazing of animals.

Biggin Hill Airport Byelaws of 1997 have been ripped up and replaced with a new set passed by the Secretary of State this month.

The full letter of the law will be applied to anyone caught dancing in such a way as to cause "reasonable annoyance" to another member of the public, under byelaw 4.20. Breaching such a byelaw is a criminal offence and could be punishable by a stiff fine.

Visitors to the airport need to get their singing out of the way in the shower, as Elvis leg-shaking could attract unwanted attention.

One byelaw reads: "No person shall sing, dance, shout, play a musical instrument, operate a Portable Music Machine or behave in such a way as to give reasonable cause for annoyance to any other person(s) on the Airport."

Farmers thinking of exploiting the lush expanse of grass could be liable to a fine under byelaw 4.23, which states: "No person shall graze Animals."

Wing-walkers are given short-shrift in the shake-up, and at first glance the rules appear strict about boarding aircraft, one of the primary reasons for visiting the airport: "No person shall enter or climb upon any part of any Aircraft."

The small print contains the words "without permission", which is understood to be a ticket or relevant employment badge.

It is also an offence to leave a vehicle in the car park without the handbrake on. Anyone with an urgent need to clean will have to suppress it, or seek clearance from authorities: "No person shall clean, service or maintain Aircraft, Vehicles or equipment in areas where such activities are prohibited by any Sign issued by the Airport Company."

No items or equipment are to be placed within three metres of the perimeter fence, perhaps so that security guards and their Dobermans can patrol unimpeded without fear of breaching "'elf and safety" rules.

Beggars should stay away and buskers, trendy on the Tube, are a strict no-no. Gambling is frowned upon, even a gentleman's bet on which plane will take off first could land you with a fine.

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